Ooh! An exciting mystery - and one which, if it happened in a work of fiction, would either lead to a thrilling adventure (probably involving ancient maps and smugglers) or something disturbing involving secret agents, mistaken identity, gangsters (albeit ones who shop at Waitrose), car chases, and a blood-soaked climax on the banks of a flooded Severn.

Some 35 years ago, your town was the headquarters of a daring detective duo called The Tremendous Two. (We They started out as spies, but couldn't find anything to spy on, so decided to branch out as detectives, only to realise that there was nothing to detect, either. The Tremendous Two would have loved this sort of mystery, and even if we they hadn't solved it, would have filled numerous pages with our their well-reasoned speculations. :-D